(FYI Sydney, we enjoy reading every act and it doesn’t cheapen it at all :-) )
We have a few stories to share of random acts of kindness done in Derek’s memory. Until today, I wasn’t exactly sure where to post these (until I saw it on the news) and didn’t really feel I needed to post about them to make them meaningful. However, I thought Steve and Brandee would be appreciative of the deeds that are being done in Derek’s memory, even if they are unaware of them. I really hope I don’t forget any. I’ll start with the smaller ones we’ve done and continue to do. Whenever on the beltline (which is a few times a day as we live in Madison) we always let people get in if they are trying. I know this one is very small, but even the simplest things can make such a difference in people’s lives. We also ALWAYS let people cross the street, crosswalk or not. One very small thing I always do is when I pass someone on the street, I don’t avoid eye-contact but instead I always smile. I’ve found that when people smile at me for no reason at all, it makes my day just a little bit better. So I decided to return the favor — we never know what’s going on in people’s lives and a random showing of kindness could make a huge difference. Another time, I heard my roommate come home at 1:00 in the morning, slamming doors and crying her eyes out. Recently right before this, her and I had a disagreement and were not very close. However, I thought about what the right thing to do was and so I texted her and told her that if she needed someone I was right out in the living room for her, despite our current tension with each other. I also always hold the door open for the person behind me, and am especially courteous to the elderly. Now to more of the larger acts of kindness. I’ve always felt very sorry for those who are homeless, so one day in the winter when a homeless man was finding shelter in the local starbucks, I bought him a hot chocolate. Even though he yelled at me and told me not to bother him and he didn’t need my help, I am not hesitant to do it again. Someone might need a little extra warmth some day. Another… I work for a University Residence Dining Hall/convenient store on campus in Madison, and most of our customers are students. One day a young mother and her son came in and he really wanted ice cream, but she was hesitant; I wasn’t sure, but I thought maybe they didn’t have much money to spend. So when they checked out, I told them not to worry about it and I paid for their snacks/groceries out of pocket. She didn’t say much as she didn’t really speak English, but I could tell on her face that she was very thankful. More recently, Trevor and I were driving home from dinner one night when we saw a dog on the side of the road. We actually almost hit her. Immediately we pulled over, put her in the car, and spent a good hour looking for somewhere to take her, knocking on doors asking if anyone was missing her, and ended up taking her to 24 hour vet hospital. I’m so thankful we found her as she was blind, she had a collar with a leash connected so some family must have been looking everywhere for her, and about 2 minutes after we got her in a car a semi drove in the exact path that she would have been standing in if we weren’t there. A few nights later, we went out to Red Robin and had a very nice waitress. She acted as though she had had a very long day, so Trevor and I gave her a very large tip even though we only got one meal to split, and wrote her a not telling her she deserved a raise, and that “p.s. my girlfriend thinks you’re pretty”. We really hope it made her night better and she went home with a smile on her face. About a week ago, Trevor drove by an elderly woman moving heavy bags of mulch from her car to her house. She was putting them in a sled and pulling them behind her, but it was clear she was struggling. He pulled over and offered to help, and ended up staying for over a half hour just talking to her. She thanked him and said it gets pretty lonely by herself sometimes, so not only did she receive some extra help with the heavy bags, but she had a friend to talk to. Trevor and I plan to go over there very soon, take her flowers, and play a few board games with her. A more long term act of kindness I have been working on is crocheting scarves to donate to the women’s shelter. For right now, this is the only place I am aware of to take them, but I am going to be looking at more local homeless shelters and non-profit organizations to donate them. After I make enough scarves, I plan to make tie blankets and I hope to donate everything before the winter. Last winter was unbearable so I’m sure anybody could use a little extra warmth. We only plan to continue to do random acts of kindness, but this is what we have so far!! We plan to spread the word about Derek in Madison more than we already have.
Stdney Whitaker and Trevor Mann
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